“Why doesn’t anyone want to date me?”
This is a question people often ask themselves. While there are many reasons why one might not be getting the callbacks from people they are interested in, someone can also take a look at a situation and realize that it is something they may do or say that causes others to not want to begin a relationship with them. You may take notice of times you have acted in certain ways where you come off as being pushy, too quiet, or standoffish – which can be interpreted as someone who is not interested in being part of the crowd.
As an individual, you have to evaluate yourself and wonder if others have been telling you similar things because subconsciously, we all pay attention to how our significant others treat us when they are interacting with other friends for example. Do listen when your loved ones tell you straight up what gets on their nerves!
1. You are not one who like to go out much
You love keeping to the privacy and comfort of your home and going out for anything other than something amazing is not your cup of tea. One thing that can help kill two birds with one stone is finding new people to pursue activities with who share some common interests, hobbies, or passions as you!
You will be amazed at how quickly hanging out with new friends from an outside environment will turn from an “all alone” activity into a once-in-awhile adventure instead of a regular obligation.
Also, do not underestimate just how appealing and fun striking up conversations with interesting and upbeat people who share similar outlooks and personalities as you can be!
Even if you feel nervous or anxious about trying something new outside your home – always remember you have complete control over how far things go and where they might lead after starting as simple acquaintances with people sharing common interests as yourself.
2. Your “Me Time” is Only Your Own
Me-time is important, but it cannot whip up your whole schedule. There will always be activities that you prefer to do on your own. But for those activities that could be enhanced by the presence of another person (and if they’re appropriate), it’s good to keep in mind that by bringing another person into activities you love – like walking your dog or shopping or relaxing at a music lounge or any other hangout spot – you might potentially turn the experience into a more fulfilling and more enjoyable one.
3. You are Just too Busy to Meet and Date
One big mistake that people tend to make in their dating life is not prioritizing their schedules properly. As you can tell, it is not easy juggling two jobs or having other obligations at home. But dating does not have to take up much of your time. What are you doing in your free time right now? What about an hour or two once a week where you could connect with someone?
One way to ease your stress related to your work is by finding time every week to enjoy activities that treat you well like spending time with someone special since that can help set the mood. You do not necessarily need more than an hour or two each week (depending on how much extra time you need) – which means you could dedicate this time towards scheduling your initial date.
If it does turn out well between the two of you, chances are it will not take much longer than an hour or two. Even if things do not pan out, however, keep in mind that planning will help you avoid feeling tired and burned out.
4. Dressing Up is Not Your Thing
No matter what you wear on the date, make sure it is clean, put together, and fresh. There are some products that can go a long way when it comes to making yourself feel more confident.
However, just because you use these products for your own self-care does not mean anyone who can clearly see you is going to want to date you. Finding the balance between looking your best, yet not overdoing it with fake lashes or excessive hairspray will give off an air of someone who takes care of herself, but also knows when she should wash her hair every few days, so she does not look gross in front of others.
You must strike a balance between being clean enough, so you do not have BO or chipped nail polish while also not meticulously primping like you are getting ready for the red carpet.
5. The Ghost of Past Relationships are Still Lingering
It is not easy to meet someone, and finding love is even tougher. As such, you should not put yourself out there before you are ready. There comes a time when we must confront our past so we can move on and let go – and it is important to understand why we hold onto certain things and how they affect us not only now but also in the future. It is time for you to be able to disclose your emotional baggage if you want to find that special someone who will cherish you. We hope this helps.
It is okay to keep some things private, but you need to be willing to tell the people who are important to you about it if you want them to accept you. Do not rush yourself into relationships just because you feel lonely or sad. Make sure that if they can accept your past then maybe they are the one for you.
6. Your Standards are too Damn High!
Do you know how some people say you should date within your “rating?” It is kind of like when you have a credit score of five hundred, but then expect to be able to get the best financing that money can buy.
While it is true that you can get better financing if you have higher creditworthiness, it does not always happen because having a high credit score also means you are more likely to have shown monetary responsibility in the past.
So, think about other things besides looks and money before looking for your latest really hunky boyfriend or girlfriend. For example, make sure they are actually nice to other people instead of being full of themselves.
Do you know how people say it is never too early or late to start exploring your options when you want to find love? Be open to possibilities while keeping an eye out for someone who has the qualities you are looking for. It may take dating multiple people before you find the right one, so remember not to settle if he is not your ideal match upfront.
7. You Rely More on Other’s Opinions
Whether they do it consciously or not, sometimes the people closest to you can subtly decide who you end updating. It is important to make your own decisions, especially the ones around potential partners (or flings).
For example, if you can tell that you are ready to move on from one guy, but your friends are trying to set you up with another friend-of-a-friend whom they think is gaga over you – chances are high that this second guy may just be a bridge to help get you over the first guy.
Likewise, though, perhaps there is a reason – no matter how seemingly ridiculous – that your best friend’s brother is not someone that interests you? These questions and more must be considered when deciding who gets a chance at dating “you” not “your entire social circle.” In order to truly find happiness after a breakup or during an era of easy relationships – take heed! Remember not every story needs a sequel!
8. You are just too Clingy!
In the dating scene, the rule is to keep meeting new people while keeping things a bit casual. Keep it cool and do not act like a crazy girlfriend or boyfriend on the first date. So, some would argue that we should never get invested in any one person since we “should not put all of our eggs in the same basket,” but this strategy is not always ideal, and can lead to some potentially lonely times.
There is nothing worse than falling for someone who does not reciprocate that feeling back towards you. It hurts! Time to take a lesson from writers: Do your research and treat everyone with kindness. Do not freak out over things you have no control over such as what others do for fun outside of your presence. Only invest in people who show interest in investing back into you, too.
9. You are way too Competitive
Do you sometimes find yourself having difficulty finding that perfect middle ground when it comes time to have a disagreement with someone? Here is the thing: just because you find yourself frequently and readily getting dragged into arguments does not mean you have anger issues, but rather than the people around who hardly know you tend to interpret this as an aggressive person.
Take a step back and think about it – would we want to enter into a conversation and leave it feeling belittled or defeated? Letting things escalate unnecessarily only makes us feel terribly bad, right?
Try to be more chilled out and lighthearted because no one wants an argument! Going forward, they may become wary of what it means when they have a friendly debate with you.
10. You can be Tactless often
Being tactful means knowing when to change the subject or avoid saying something that someone might feel uncomfortable with. It can be demanding work trying to say everything right because it is an art form to find the perfect combination of words for what you want someone else to believe. The best way NOT to hurt people is by thinking carefully before you speak. Just like nothing good ever comes out of opening your mouth without forethought, there is no need to try and say anything if it is not necessary which could end up hurting another person unintentionally instead of tactfully giving them your opinion.
11. Even You Would Not Date Yourself
I am not saying something extreme like you only live once. I know the adage is kind of outdated. But what I am saying is that if you do not take some time off, your idea is going to be expressed with the same enthusiasm as an overused cliche. A lot of people do not want to date themselves or they may feel uncomfortable doing so because they do not feel great about themselves.
But everybody is worthy of love, yet sometimes it is hard for others to realize this – even when it comes down to dating ourselves! For many, dating oneself can seem daunting or embarrassing, but it does not have to be, nor should it exclusively be reserved for those who are introverted.
It is easy to say that you are not as bad as you think and that you should stop criticizing yourself; however, it is something you really need to figure out deep down inside. For many people, self-antagonism is actually an outlet for disrespecting other people – like their spouse or partner of the other sex. There are all kinds of things one can do to help improve one’s sense of self-esteem, but perhaps the most surefire method is taking some time “off” in order to learn more about who one really is so one can appreciate themselves better!
